Empower Your Life: Choices that Matter

Welcome to Authentic Living with Linda
I’m Linda Codlin

Welcome, My Friends.

“Life is what we make it.”

Have you heard this saying, and thought ‘yeah, right.’
“Try living in my life”

Today I want to explore the thought that we don’t have a say in what happens to us.

Have you ever found yourself in the middle of a situation and wondered how you got there?

If you were able to rewind the movie of your life and rewatch it at a slower speed than living it, there will have been a pivotal moment when you made a decision that took you towards the situation.
A fork in the road, maybe, where you went one way, instead of going the other.

We choose what we know, we choose what is comfortable for us.
Hence we seem to find ourselves in the same or similar situations.

We surround ourselves with people who think like we do, it is comfortable, it might not be what we really need to move the needle of our life in the direction we want.
But it is familiar.

When the pain of change, is less painful than staying where we are, we change.

Often our lives are on a replay loop, we do the same things today as we did yesterday, as we did last year.
If we want to move our lives in the direction of our dreams we must do something different.
To get a different result, we have to have a different input. This input begins with a thought, a feeling, or an action.

Empowerment through Choice.

Empowerment through choice by choosing gratitude over complaining.

Everyone of us has a choice, most of us don’t know we have a choice.
We walk through our lives moving from one situation to another without stopping to consider another way of being.
We complain when people are rude to us, when a driver cuts in front of us, or tailgates so close one tap of the brakes would see them on the back seat.
We complain about our loved ones, niggling at the smallest things they do.

In each of these situations we have choices.
What is your default reaction?
How do you respond when people are rude to you?
Do you get all fired up and let them know you won’t tolerate their behaviours, or do you silently walk away, having a massive conversation in your mind about how you’d like to teach them some manners?
Each of these responses is a choice.

So is choosing to respond politely, placing the ‘red velvet rope’ around yourself.
You can confront the rude person in a way that doesn’t belittle them, or make them wrong.
You can set your ‘red velvet rope’ up by letting them know it is not acceptable to speak to you in the manner with which they did. In a calm and non-threatening way, being completely in control of yourself.
You can choose to find ways of being grateful for this person, and have the audacity to mention it to them.
Most people are starving for recognition, for acknowledgement of what they do, for a simple and genuine thank you.
When we make the choice to shift from complaining to gratefulness, we shift the energy of ourselves, and the interaction of the other person with us.

We take the other road, the road that is new, which creates a new dynamic, which has a different result.
Add enough other road decisions, and in a short time frame we will be in a completely new space.
We will have made our live’s different.

Empowering through choice by responding calmly in conflict.

We get to step away from conflict. This could be physically or this could be emotionally.
We can recognise the signs in advance that an argument is brewing, it takes two people to argue.
You get to shift the needle of your relationships by how you respond.
You can walk away, usually the argument will follow you, because the other person hasn’t felt seen or heard.
You can walk towards the argument, with caring. Especially if it is a loved one who is needing your understanding.
When you walk towards the argument, remember to breathe to keep yourself calm. Decide in advance, what type of energy you want to bring with you.
If the reason for the conflict is work related, what outcome do you want, and what outcome does the manager, or supervisor want.
Remember people who are hurting, hurt people. Listen to what is being said, and listen to what is not being said.
Keep calm and listen actively, ask quality questions, try to understand where they are coming from without putting yourself down.
Stepping outside your normal emotional response will bring different results.

Empowering through choice by opting for action over procrastination.

We get to make a difference in our lives one action at a time.
Every action we take moving towards our goals or projects shifts the needle. When we do enough small actions in the direction we want to go, the power of momentum begins to happen, which creates more dynamic opportunities to complete your goal or project in less time.
Breaking your goal or project or task into smaller more managable pieces of work, can reduce the feelings of overwhelm, or that time is running out, or that you will never get it all done.
Shifting these thoughts to more powerful thoughts, will help you make a deliberate choice to take action in the direction of what you want, rather than doing something else to distract you from the feelings that you want to avoid.
For every action or inaction you take, you are having an effect on your life. You are getting to make your life, your way.
And if you find you don’t like where your action or inaction is taking you, you can do a YOU turn and make different decisions.

Empowering through choice by embracing your health.

Yes, you knew it was coming, sooner or later our health choices are mentioned.
You know why, don’t you?
Your health is the most important gift you can give yourself.
Our body’s want to feel vibrant, alive, well and energetic.
We have the ability to make this happen, and when we do we feel on top of the world.
Making small choices daily in what we eat or drink, can have a massive impact on our health. These small decisions have the accumulative effect of giving our body’s a fighting chance to heal and thrive.
When we add in movement, moving our body in a way that brings joy and pleasure, we shift our energy, we find we have more energy than we ever believed we could.
The movement I’m talking about is loving movement that supports your body, wherever it is on the journey in health and well-being. I do not recommend punishing your body, or your mind for that matter. The energy you do anything in, is the energy you get to keep that thing.
You can exercise and punish your body, but the energy isn’t supporting your body for long term health and eventually your body will have an injury, or you may improve your fitness and the shape of your body, but mentally you live in fear that if you stop, you will lose the benefits you have worked for.
My belief is when you find the way to move your body, that respects and honours you, you will want to do it, it will feel delightful.
You might like dancing, walking and chatting, yoga with a group, running for the sheer joy of moving your body. You might like a particular sport, and playing that sport makes you feel alive and energised. The secret is to find what you love and do that.
Embrace your health with love, joy and respect. You will be creating a better more vibrant life for yourself.

Empowerment through choice by forgiveness over resentment.

Forgiveness is never about the other person.
Forgiveness is about you, it’s about taking back your control, taking back your power.
Every time you hold onto resentment, even if it seems such a trivial thing, you are giving your emotional power away to someone else.
The person you are holding resentment against has the power to evoke an emotional response from you, and usually it is not a rational one.
I tell my clients unforgiveness is like having an invisible cord tied from their heart to that someone who has hurt them.
The more they think and dwell on the wrong doings or the other person the thicker the cord becomes, and the slower and heavier their life becomes.
If you are holding on 5 or 10 people by not forgiving them, that is a lot of emotional baggage slowing down your life.
No wonder you don’t have energy to pursue what you want.
Forgiveness is not about letting the other person off the hook, it is not diminishing the harm that was caused.
Forgiveness is about freeing you from carrying the burden, and the emotional strain of the harm.
When we learn to keep short tabs on the hurt other people create, we keep our energy clean, which allows us to move with ease and grace through our lives.
Forgiveness gives you the power to be in control of your triggers, your decisions, your emotions, and your actions.
This is a recipe for change.

This is “Life as we make it”

I hope there are a few tips in here to help you make your life as you want it to be.
If you want guidance to create a life you will love living, connect with me and we can work together to create a plan to move you into your authentic energy stream.

Until next time: Empower yourself through choice. Choose gratitude over complaints, Choose to respond calmly in conflict, Opt for action over inaction, Embrace the fullness of health and well-being, Choose forgiveness over resentment and set your spirit free.

oxoxo Linda

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As a certified Life Coach, I help you to help yourself, so you can create a well lived life your way. 

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