We develop our CHARACTER muscles
by Overcoming Challenges and Obstacles.
Hello My Friends
Don’t you wish sometimes that with a click of your fingers, you will overcome the obstacle that is sitting in your way?
The thing about obstacles, is they have so much for us to learn from them.
Situations that challenge us, do so because we haven’t mastered those particular skills yet.
Obstacles involving other people are some of the biggest challenges that we face.
The skills required to deal with people are generally experience based.
Reading a book will give you ideas and tips on how to handle situations, it’s not until you are in a situation and you use these ideas and tips that you will actually know how they work, and who they work for.
Each month I choose a topic to develop in myself.
This month is a cross over of two topics.
I have this thing that happens when I go to the library, the book I need to read seems to call me and then jumps out at me.
Last week the book titled “Rejection Proof – How to Beat Fear and Become Invincible’ by Jin Jiang jumped out at me.
This subject has been a theme throughout my life. I have run away from asking for what I want because I was afraid of being rejected.
It is always easier to reject myself, my ideas and my dreams than it is to voice them for someone else to reject them.
In all honesty the biggest obstacle I’m facing and have been facing for a long time now is the obstacle of self belief. (I think we all do, and as we grow we find new areas of self belief to upgrade.)
Everything boils down to belief in the end.
We will never rise above or stay above what we believe ourselves to be.
Our self belief is like a thermostat.
It subconsciously dictates how we respond to every situation we face.
And we have beliefs about everything.
Gender behaviours, the way we should be working, expectations for how our home is to look, expectations on how we interact with people.
What hot feels like, who is ‘good enough’ to be your friends, where you deserve to live, how you get around, and what you think about yourself.
Self belief is also adjustable like a thermostat.
It looks like this month is a month of stretching into the uncomfortable and beginning to rejection proof myself, from the inside out.
Is feeling rejected something you avoid?
Do you walk away from situations that may make you feel hurt because someone didn’t respond to your request in the way you want? (Before you even ask.)
I do, and I have become aware of it over the last little while.
Awareness is good. Nothing will change without awareness.
However nothing will change without a change in thought, and action.
Overcoming obstacles grows character.
And everything you and I want is on the other side of the fear that is keeping us playing small.
Let me repeat that.
Everything you and I want, is on the other side of the fear that is keeping us playing small.
For me it is facing my fear of being rejected, using my voice, being heard and asking for what I really want.
What is it you want that is on the other side of your fear?
Are you willing to admit what you want to yourself?
Are you willing to acknowledge the fear that is sitting between where you are now and what you want?
This is the best thing about coaching, it doesn’t matter where we are on the path, each one of us has our own journey, our own struggles and our own growth.
We can learn the skills and tools to move through the obstacles that are holding us back.
It all begins with a thought and a belief. A belief is a series of thoughts that have been thought for so long they don’t seem like thoughts any longer.
The secret key is to find the hidden thoughts, and change them, then follow that up with new thoughtful actions.
There is so much power in that short sentence.
Today’s challenge is to look at the obstacle standing on your path as your teacher. What skills do you need to fine tune or gather to overcome in this situation?
It will always be something within you, you can not change anyone else, you can not make anyone else think in a way that suits you.
The only person you have complete control over, is you. The way you think about your obstacle will determine how you deal with the obstacle.
You have the magic wand, you get to wave it. How will you use it?
What will you wish for? For you to become the person who handles this situation with ease and grace, with compassion and strength.
Or will you wish for the problem to go away, for someone else to deal with it, or will you wish for someone to blame.
If you want to talk about where you are on your journey and how you can move ahead in a supportive environment, contact me for a coaching consultation.
Together we can work out a plan to move through the obstacle holding you back.
And if it happens to be the fear of rejection, watch this space as I challenge myself to overcome the fear of being rejected and begin asking for what I want.
Authentic Living with Linda is about facing life with wisdom and truth wrapped in everyday events. Sometimes those events need to be manufactured to create the change that is wanted.
Until next time, challenge yourself to live your best and most authentic life.
As a certified Life Coach, I help you to help yourself, so you can create a well lived life your way.
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When you are ready to make a transformational difference in your life, contact me for a one on one coaching session.
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