Hello My Friends,
Last week, I asked you to be aware of what you were thinking, How did you get on?
This week, I’ve been thinking about what success looks like to me. When I ask myself the question, “How am I living in abundance today?” (This is linked to my WOY (word of the year)) I somehow slide into thinking about success, and how I can be successful? I’ve noticed that the underlining thought is that I’m not successful yet. Which when I look at the facts is actually untrue. I am very successful.
The dictionary defines success as “The accomplishment of one’s aim or purpose.” “The attainment of wealth, position, and honours.”
Success seems to be a term that comes loaded with guilt, The guilt of not having achieved “success” by a ‘certain age’, or having a ‘certain life style’. On the flip side there is the guilt of having ‘the life style’, and having ‘achieved wealth’.
Success as a generality is a term of comparison, “Are you successful compared to your peers?” “Are you successful compared to what your parents expectations are?” How does society expect a person who has achieved success to behave, to live?” “Are you successful if you have a large bank balance?” Are you successful if you are married?” Are you successful if you have children?”
Does that mean you’re not successful, if you’re not like your peers? or you haven’t lived up to your parents expectations? or your bank account doesn’t have multiple zeros after the digits? or you are single? or childless? I think not.
Who defines what success is?
I believe we each define our own version of success.
We live in an abundant world, “The accomplishment of one’s aim or purpose” is an open ended invitation to be and do or have whatever we want. If your version of success is owning your own home, go for it, if your version of success is travelling the world, go for it, if it’s having children, do it. If you are prepared to do the things that will enable you to accomplish your aim or purpose, you can have success.
To me that’s the external success taken care of.
What defines the internal success?
You know, the kindness, the spitefulness, the love, the anger, the confidence, the cowardice, the peace, the jealousy, the gentleness, the harshness, the joy. The way we treat ourselves when no-one else is watching. These are the things that are not so easy to pinpoint as successes. I believe these attributes are every bit as important as the external successes. The thoughts that drive these attributes define how we behave, what we achieve, how well we live our lives in the every day.
You are successful, when you show you care about yourself by eating with mindfulness, by going for a walk when you don’t feel like it, when you sit with your anger and let it tell you what’s really going on under the event.
You are successful, when you walk into the board room confident in your abilities, when you respond to your children’s demands in an appropriate manner, when you sit and cry because your heart is breaking, when you bite your tongue instead of spewing out the venom that you want to. These are the greatest successes, these are the successes that go unseen and unappreciated.
You are successful, I am successful.
My definition of success is “I choose to think on purpose, to allow all my thoughts a place to be observed, to keep those that work for me and redefine those that don’t serve me, I choose to act on those thoughts that bring me closer to my goals, aims and purpose. I notice and celebrate when I succeed in taking a step closer to the me I want to be.”
In closing, what is your definition of success?
Remember you define what success looks like to you.
This week, set yourself a goal and work toward it, celebrating every step forward as a success. You can succeed, one thought at a time.
Have a successful week, Be your authentic self, until next time.