Hello My friends.
This week I want to talk about being authentic.
To be authentic means to have an alignment within yourself.
That all parts are congruent with each other.
When there is internal conflict, the world seems off slightly, our energy has to flow over or around the block.
Imagine that your energy radiates through you, a bit like a wind tunnel, it draws air through it by vacuum. If the wall of the tunnel cracks and spills dirt into the tunnel in one area, the air can still flow through it, maybe a little slower than before, that’s when you feel a bit off, not enough for the warning bells to ring, but just a little niggle that somethings not right.
If you ignore this little niggle, the crack may widen and spill more dirt, or another fracture may appear somewhere else, and you have a second, third or fourth pile of dirt blocking the air flow. Eventually, if you neglect the signs that something is amiss, then the entire wall of the tunnel may collapse blocking all but a whisper of air from getting through.
Some of you may be living in the space where only a whisper of your energy is getting through the blockages. You know something is not right, you’re tired of being tired, you’re over, overeating, you’re feeling drained and depleted, it doesn’t matter how much money is in the bank it never seems to be enough, you feel unloved even when you have loved ones around you.
I am here to give you hope, there is a way to clear the blockages. It will take work and time. Just as in the analogy of the tunnel, to clear the collapsed walls it will take work and time.
For you to be in alignment with your true self, you must discover what it is that makes you, you. What are your core values? These are the things that consistently guide your life. These are like the filter that you run everything you do and think through. You consider these to be important or beneficial. For some people it’s honesty, integrity, or monetary value, being reliable, doing what you say you’re going to do, being where you say you’re going to be, loyalty, and respect. For some it might be, How will this person help me get what I want? What’s in it for me?
Sometimes our values are given to us by default, we collect them like precious toys as children, from the significant adults in our lives, and the experiences we have along the way.
For today I want to ask a few questions to get you thinking about what motivates you to do what you do. Where there could be mis-alignments, detracting from you being your authentic self.
- What do you enjoy doing the most? Where would you spend all your time if you could? What activity has you so involved that the hours just whisk away? For me it’s reading and writing, the hours just melt away.
- What are the activities, or things you couldn’t live without? Is it that sense of luxury that stylish clothes give you? Is it the morning walk around the garden? Is it the type of home you live in or the type of car you drive? Maybe for you it’s having a clutter free home? Living as frugally as you can? One of mine is living in a sunny home, I choose to live in sunny homes, every-time.
- What is the one thing that always, always irritates you about other people? Is it their being late? or not thinking about other peoples needs? or is it their leaving the equipment they used out, instead of putting it away after them? or is it not saying what they really mean? What irritates me, are people being treated unfairly. When you’ve figured out what always irritates you, flip it over and see what the opposite is, that will give you a clue to what your value is. In the example I gave above my value is justice.
- How do you behave when you’re under stress or pressure, when things don’t go the way you plan? Do you withdraw? Do you yell? Do you sulk? Do you eat? Do you spend money? Do you help other people? What is your avoidance mechanism? This I believe is the easiest way to tell what your core values really are. One of mine is eating, it is a form of self punishment, take that! you naughty girl. The underlying value for me has been I’m not good enough.
Can you relate, The I’m not enough value is so insidious it pervades everything.
As you work your way through discovering your core values, you may find some that don’t serve you. I have found, that uncovering the thought behind the value and changing that thought for one that serves me better has changed the way I behave.
What you think, you become. Thoughts create feelings, feelings create actions, actions create habits and habits create a well lived life. Choose your thoughts carefully, they are what your tomorrows are built on today.
Let me know what your core values are by emailing me on firstname.lastname@example.org
Have a value centred week, Be your authentic self, until next time.